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Spotlight Nor'East

In the February edition of the Newsletter:

Wallaby in Yorkshire Wildlife Park; photo by Mark Lewis

• Chenda Chats
• March Wayzgoose
• Wild Mushroom Recipes by Jon Bemrose
• Book review - The Maid by Kathy Lewis
• The Coldest Month by David Smith
• PLUS Crossword

Chenda Chats

I believe one of the symptoms of 'maturity' is the tendency to start collecting things. For a long time, when I was younger, I really wanted to be the sort of person who collected something, but I couldn't think of anything I wanted to collect. Then I got hooked on oxymorons and I was away. Many of you helped me with my oxymoron collection and made me very happy. Please feel free to keep helping me, should you be afflicted with further inspiration.

Then there was the hole in the road story which resulted in my becoming a collector of used postage stamps. (Yorkshire Water dug up the road, failed to fill it in, I complained, they still failed to fill it in, I complained big time, so they sent the conciliation officer round to pacify me, and he persuaded me to collect used postage stamps). Many of you have, and still do, collect used postage stamps and give or send them to me. They are currently used to raise funds for the cancer ward at Sheffield Children's Hospital, and are much appreciated.

And now I have a new collection to embark on. A friend of a friend of a friend is something to do with a Ladies Barbershop Chorus and they are collecting bras to support (ho, ho) the Yorkshire Air Ambulance. (Could only happen in Yorkshire, couldn't it?). I've been speculating for a while on precisely how one powers a helicopter with bras, but the engineering is a bit beyond me. I've decided it's much easier just to believe that they need bras and show willing.

Which, of course, is where you come in! Would you please send me/give me any surplus bras you may happen to have, so that I can help keep that helicopter in working order? (If you post them to me (other than via the office franking machine!) I can collect the stamps from your package, as well, so you'd be adding to two of my collections). Being a fella is not an excuse. Even if you don't have any bras yourself, you don't need to worry, I won't ask where you got them from. You probably have a mother and/or sisters and/or daughters and/or female acquaintances who would be willing to part with their redundant upholstery, if you ask them nicely. You could try telling them some far-fetched tale about helicopters, to justify importuning them for their unwanted underwear.

Apparently, bras that are still in working order can be sold to second hand clothing traders, both here and abroad, and end-of-life models can be recycled into industrial wipers and cloths, mattress filling, insulation and new fibres. Well, that's their story, anyway. I suspect they may all be closet pantomime dames, really. And if I'm creating dames, I guess that makes me the queen.

Look forward to seeing you,
I'm Chenda Appleyard

Wild Mushroom Recipes

I was out locally in the woods the other day and found my first Shaggy Parasol mushrooms of this season (Lepiota rhacodes became Macrolepiota rhacodes and is currently Chlorophyllum rhacodes). Just two of them, one with a 4" cap, one a 5" cap, and I of course gathered them. (There will be dozens more at this site in coming weeks.)

IF GATHERING FROM THE WILD PLEASE BE SURE YOU KNOW WHAT YOU HAVE!

One version of a Spaghetti Carbonara...
For a portion: I set some spaghetti to cook/boil (1 thumb thickness diameter = approx 1 portion for long spaghetti - adjust for short spaghetti.)

Next, start to fry some bacon lardons, approx 75-100g, in a dash of olive oil. Add sliced or chopped garlic (your preference), 1 clove approx., and the sliced mushrooms (caps only for these as stalks can be tough - again approx 100g if using commercial mushrooms) at a size you like.

Now you have two options:

1) Classic: add some grated fresh Parmesan (don't use the "baby sick powder") to your preference into the mushrooms, drain and stir in the spaghetti into the mushrooms, separate an egg, add the yolk and stir in to thicken. (You can use the white for other recipes.)

Drizzle with a tablespoon of cream, a little olive oil, grate a little more parmesan and finish with a screw of fresh black pepper.

2) Add 100ml double cream to the pan, boil and reduce to thicken and then add drained pasta and stir in. Top with grated parmesan.

Jon Bemrose

Book review - The Maid

While not my favourite historical heroine, Joan of Arc has always held a certain fascination for me, and this debut novel by Kimberly Cutter gave me the opportunity to follow the story of Joan - here Jehanne D'Arc - from a more intimate perspective.

The story is written primarily from Jehanne's perspective, but the third person narrative also allows for an occasional authorial voice which I found a little intrusive. "Maybe we can forgive Jehanne for..." I'll decide what I'll forgive her for, thanks. Jehanne as presented has a strong, fierce voice and seems quite capable of speaking for herself, in spite of being a young girl thrown into a military situation exclusively for adult males.

Partially due to the framing device of Jehanne telling the tale from her cell and partially due to stylistic technique, the narrative moves between present and past tense and as a result takes some time to engage the reader. However, while Jehanne herself is a difficult character at first, she eventually draws one in and proves, if not always likeable, at least worthy of respect.

I found the novel to have far too much description in places, with exceptionally long paragraphs I was tempted to skip. At other points the style is much sparser and Cutter is clearly at her best when describing action. The frustration of Jehanne's dismissal by the men in power is palpable during the earlier sections and when we get to the battle sequences the pace and interest both pick up sharply.

The obvious snag with a Joan of Arc story is that we all know how it will end, and Cutter foreshadows this very early on so that we are fully anticipating the downward slide long before it begins. Cutter is not afraid to show the brutality of war, and we expect brutality in Joan's ultimate fate. I won't spoil things, but let's just say the ending was handled in a fashion both interesting and unexpected.

So would I recommend it? Yes, to those interested in a historical treatment and also those wanting a good solid story. I look forward to reading more from this author.

Kathy Lewis

The Coldest Month

It can be the best of months, it can be the worst of months. Yes, I'm quite sure Charles Dickens would have been saying that if he'd still been around for his 200th birthday, and I hadn't said it first. But February can indeed be just that. It is often our coldest month and our snowiest. I remember that there were few years when my birthday parties held early in the month didn't have a row of little wellies lined up on the lino in the hall because of the snow, and yet we do sometimes get a day or two at the end of the month when spring really seems to have arrived and all that lopping and pruning has brought on enough of a sweat to ditch the Barbour and roll up our sleeves.

It's a month to plan as well. How are we going to plant out our beds this year? What variety of potatoes are we going to grow? And the tomatoes; this is the time to think of sowing them in containers in a heated greenhouse or on a sunny windowsill. Peppers need even more time, so this is the month to start the thinking process.

I no longer have an allotment, due, I'm sure I've told you, because here in Northallerton, I'm more likely to get the six foot plot before the two rod version, and I've got out of the habit. But if there is one thing that would persuade me back it would be spuds. Spuds with lovely creamy tastes that chip like heaven, mash like ambrosia, and roast to the glory of the gods.

Yes, I know, I do go on a bit about tatties, but they're important. I've not got space to list many that I would plant but Belle de Fontenay is a first early with lovely waxy flesh that makes anything you'll get nowadays from Jersey taste like school dinners.

There is also Pink Fir Apple, just as tasty but a tad prone to blight but a superb salad variety. Then there are the main crops: the big Daddies! Anything with a heritage from the King Edwards, like Majestic, but my real favourite is Sante. This is a real all rounder; good for chipping, boiling or baking and it's the choice of a lot of commercial organic growers because of its resistance to blight. A real winner is this one in my opinion.

Now tomatoes. So many of us grow them in our greenhouses, and quite right too, but what are we growing? Moneymaker, Alicante, and varieties of cherry toms that look good but have the character and flavour of used tea bags. Think again. If you're going to use your greenhouse and spend all that time and effort make it worthwhile.

I always suffer withdrawals in October when once again I'm stuck with shop tomatoes. I did find that at one time Asda used to sell a tasty English tomato all winter grown in Leeds of all places. Apparently the growers used the spare heat from a next door factory or something, but sadly they disappeared from the shelves.

I grow a variety I found many years ago which seems to keep true to form from seed every year called Odoriko. It has a lovely flavour and a deep red flesh with very few pips but not very prolific. It seems that it's only available in the States now though.

Another one I grow every year was oddly one that I discovered in a Waitrose about six years ago. I was so impressed with the flavour that I kept some seed and I've been growing it ever since.

Funnily enough neither of these varieties ever seems to cross fertilise; I dare say somebody out there will explain the reason. But be adventurous; break away from your garden centre and try some seed companies. There are many, but two that I've found useful are Simpson's Seeds, who are in Wiltshire and specialise in tomatoes and peppers and always have a stand at the Chilli Fiesta at West Dean Gardens in West Sussex. In 2012 it's on 27th-29th July. If you're nearby then give it a try; even if you're not you should try it, it's an experience. More Salsa than Sussex! Marvellous! There are lots of stands giving out freebies so you can almost go around the show and do without lunch. But beware; some of the chilli dips are on the red side of danger and should have a health warning. Anyway Simpsons are good with tomatoes. Also you could try Chiltern Seeds at Ulverston in Cumbria. Their catalogue is a cornucopia for gardeners. Try it.

February though, as we all know can be very cold. I don't do a lot in the garden at this time. If I've not pruned or lopped in the autumn then I leave dead seed heads and everything around for hibernating insects and for the blue tits to explore for titbits. Leave your rose pruning as well until there's that small show of growth in the leaf buds. You can then see where your growth is coming from and in which direction it's going. What sort of winter we've had I don't know, as at time of writing we've been pretty lucky but last year was an Armageddon in my garden. All my Echinaceas went, along with the lavenders and hebes. Five climbing roses succumbed, an Arbutus Unido and even an established, tough as old boots Pyracantha, lost its will to live; and that in the mellow Vale of York! I'm sure there were many more that I'd forgotten were there that also died, so I reappraised my planting last spring and kept away from the susceptibles; after all plants are not cheap, and the pennies need counting, but we must look ahead, that's what gardeners do, and just look at those lovely crocuses out there in that sunny border, and wasn't it a good idea to plant those snowdrops just there by the back door so you see them when you take out the rubbish? And, oh look, isn't that our first daffodil down there? The best of months or the worst of months? I suppose it's all in the mind really.

Gardening's a very subjective thing, and that's what gives it its appeal. Millions of gardeners up and down the country, all doing their own thing with gusto and enthusiasm, and hardly any of it to our taste. You might think some of them are the equivalent to an avocado bathroom suite as you saunter the avenues and closes of England, but they're ours, and we're renowned for them. A nation of shopkeepers? No, we're gardeners through and through. Now secateurs at the ready, hang on to yer hats. March is on its way.

Just be a bit adventurous, but enjoy it.

P.S. I've got just a few saved tomato seeds I can share. Kathy has my e-mail address if anybody's interested.

David Smith